Falling in Love with Toilets (Without Shame)
So, umm, yesterday something weird happened. I may or may not have fallen in love with a toilet. Feel free to judge me, but be warned: if you continue to read this post, the same thing is probably going to happen to you. So, you know, judge lightly.
The toilet is the Veil by Kohler and, in addition to being “intelligent”, it’s gorgeous. I happened upon it yesterday whilst perusing the Pinterests. Joe and I have recently decided to start seriously looking into purchasing our first home, and it will most definitely mean renovations. So, inevitably, Pinterest. Now I’ve seen a smart toilet or two before, but they’ve always been a bit clunky in my experience. You’re going to get a fancy ass experience (pun intended), but the toilet itself looks like a machine. With the Veil, this far from the case. Looking at it, it might not even register at first that it is in fact a loo, but it is—plus quite a bit more.
Let’s start at the beginning of your Veil experience (because it is an experience). The lid on the toilet is automatic and motion-activated, so all you have to do is walk up to it, and you’re off. Think of the seat up/seat down arguments it could save you from! For what happens after you take your position, let’s pretend you aren’t using one of the two personalized presets. First, use the touch-screen remote to decide what temperature you would like the seat to be. Pro tip: For those chilly winter months, you may want to do this before you sit down. After that, the toilet will sing you a song and read you the news for that day. JK, it doesn’t do that last bit. But hey, ideas. Right Kohler?? The good news is that with this toilet, your phone is the dirtiest thing you’ll be touching at any point during the process (though, that might be true regardless of what toilet you’re using). When you’re finished/have run out of things to look at on Facebook, choose among the various warm-water cleansing options to destroy all evidence of what happened here. Finally, enjoy a warm-air dry, and you’re off!
Of course, there are other things to be taken care of after this point, but you can leave that to the Veil too. As expected, it comes with an automatic flush. Though, if you so desire, you can choose the manual dual flush. As for cleaning, the wand is taken care of with a rinse and UV light. And, the final awesome feature I should mention is a nightlight. So you don’t have to choose between messing up your circadian rhythm and a stubbed toe if you have to go in the middle of the night.
Retail price for the Kohler Veil is $4,500 (or $5,400 for the wall-hung option). If you’re looking to spend more on your toilet, they have other intelligent options for as high as $7,500*. Visit Kohler’s site to find out more.
*After I finished writing this article, I decided to look into the $7,500 model, the Numi, a bit more. Turns out one of the key differences is that it actually, basically does sing you a song and read you the news for the day. I decided to keep my above sarcastic comment in anyway, as this is just simultaneously amazing and ridiculous to me.